Grouchy English Teacher on: Website Content

What is your website about? Why do people want to visit your website? You'd better know because otherwise your users certainly won't.

Writing a website is like writing a good essay. Like an essay, you need a topic, what your website is about, a thesis, why visit your website, and content, web pages about your topic and supporting your thesis.

How effective is your content design? Break out those trusty red pens and avoid these mistakes! (Imagery of your grouchy high school English teacher aside...)

Geocities Trash » F

Topic:
Thesis: Dude. I'm sweet!
Content: Here is a picture of my cat. EMAIL ME!!!1

Grouchy English Teacher is justifiably confused and upset. This page is a jumbled collection of links, jokes, and garish animated gifs. Here is a more in-depth description of a lowest common denominator website. Everyone has a better website than a Geocities Trash website, so we'll work up from here.

The Corporate Splash » D

Topic: Our Impressive Company!
Thesis: We're the BEST! You can't disagree because we look like everyone else!
Content: That chick working the phones is HOT! That guy in a suit is looking up; he has ideas and stuff!

You cannot fool Grouchy English Teacher with a professional clear plastic binder! The Corporate Splash looks professional, but it's all empty calories. There's plenty of happy business-people shaking hands, but look for something more than stock photo abuse and be sorely disappointed. The lack of real content is masked with corporate-speak filler, space-wasting layouts, and flashy, generic images. Most template-generated website devolve into The Corporate Splash.

Example: HuhCorp (HuhCorp is a parody )

The Messy Desk » C+

Topic: Everything you need to know about things worth knowing about *topic*
Thesis: Um, the DEFINITIVE and EXHAUSTIVE website for all things *topic*!
Content: Look, what do you want? Hold on... (click click click... click) ok... um... (click click) alright... yah.. wait! ok. (click) Here. Somewhere down on this page.

The Messy Desk has all the information you need... somewhere. Too bad this website is so over-full that users are overwhelmed. Sure, users with some determination will find good, useful content --but they have to work for it. The Messy Desk forgets that "just enough is more" (Marissa Mayar of Google). Large organizations and "portal" sites tend to pile up until they mutate into The Messy Desk. You cannot stop it! Oh noooOooooo! *munch munch*

The Under Construction » I

Topic: Under construction
Thesis: Coming soon!
Content: Under construction

Grouchy English Teacher is not pleased and assigns you an "Incomplete." Excessive excuses of "under construction" violate the trust between your website and your users. Please complete before the end of the quarter or you will receive an F for this assignment.

The Good Example » A+

Adaptive Path
Topic: Our Business in Internet Consulting
Thesis: Usability, measurable results for your website
Content: Info pages, bios, blog, articles, newsletter, case-studies, portfolio, conferences...

Adaptive Path is an Internet consulting company that has an excellent website. Even though this is a business, the website is informative, engaging, and useful beyond a mere "web presence." Grouchy English Teacher always presents a token "good example" from years past by her favorite student who long since graduated. This is it.

By: Drew Yates